Beginning Pictures

Tonight is a big night!  The moment some of you have been waiting for.  I for one, know that I've been waiting for this night as well, but for a different reason than ya'll.

For you guys, you get to see the "Before" pictures.  For me, I get to watch a video where my Coach tells me about cooking!  This is huge!!!!

This, for me, is a battle.  I do enjoy food.  Regardless of my life as a child, teenager and young adult... regardless of the sugar intake from the sodas, energy drinks, coffees and beer/whiskey.  I can tell you that I enjoy a good tasting meal.  Sometimes, the meal is not satisfying to me if it didn't taste good.  Sometimes it is not satisfying to me b/c I feel like we paid too much.  Other times, when I cook at home for us (yes gals, I am the cook...) I am a little hard on myself b/c I feel like it is too simple.  Do I want to be a chef?  No.  At least, I don't think I do.  But I could just picture me on an Iron Chef or something.  Really, probably better suited for a show where they could make fun of me.  Just kidding.  I'm not a bad cook.  I can follow a mean recipe.  I've also struck out.

Let me fill you in on something from my childhood/teenage years right after my mom passed.  My dad worked 3 jobs.  My older sister was just turning 17 and had a 1 year old boy, whom I baby sat a lot.  I also had my 4 siblings.  Do you know what we did all day?  We were outside.  We'd ride around on the 3-wheelers.  I'd mow the lawn while they played around climbing the fruit trees.  If not climbing around the old 1950's fuel truck that sat in our driveway, we'd be shooting hoops on our woodshed basketball hoop.  Then in the afternoon on them summer days, we'd walk down and pick up the papers from my assigned area.  I'd then walk them with me, around the neighborhood, up by the High School and the Junior High and deliver news papers. That took about 2 hours.  This was over in Washington, in a town called Silverdale.  My youngest brother was just over 2. He was small enough that when I ran out of papers in the front, I could sit him in the pouch in the front, then keep the papers in the back, balancing the weight.  Wednesdays sucked!  Thick papers.  Lots of ads.

But when we got home, it was supper time.  I was the one that prepared the meals.  For a whole summer, we either ate pan fried Sea Bass (rolled in flour and butter) with a veggie and mashed potatoes or mac-n-cheese.  That was what we had in the house, in the stand up freezer in the basement.  So, that is what they got. Other than that, the local Lutheran Church brought us food.  Not prepared, but canned goods.  Cases of Mandarin oranges, bananas, bread, milk, eggs.  For treats, we'd get a cake.  A healthy big fat birthday cake.  The kids were confused.  They didn't understand that it didn't really mean that it was there for someone's birthday. Just kidding.  Anyhow, once a week, the church would come and see how we were doing.  This was all after my aunt, uncle and 2 cousins moved back to Montana.  My aunt had moved over with us to help out my mom. After mom passed, eventually we moved back to Montana too. We even had a couple of would-be nannies try to "tame" us.  I swear, Orphan Annie and the kids from Nanny McPhee had nothing on us kids!

Back to the point, I just cooked the way I knew how!  Even with growing up the rest of my high school days in Montana, my aunts and uncles bought what they could afford to feed us and their kids too. So you eat a lot of spaghetti and cheap pizza, sloppy joes, potatoes, etc...  Let me tell you something.  When you have 13 people living in a 3 bedroom single wide trailer home, you're thankful for what you get and you're grateful for what is being done for you.

So, I will leave you with this.  Honestly, I'm afraid that some people that may be following this blog, that have no clue what I look like, well they may not go tell someone about my blog anymore after seeing my picture.  They may not want to share this journey.  I have felt at some very low times (internally) that my siblings and my wife, and some close friends should be embarrassed to be seen with me.  Matter of fact, I can remember a couple of statements that were made by these said family (not siblings) and friends, where you would think I was justified to feel like they were indeed embarrassed   But I know they love me and that is not how they see me.  I know I lift their spirits and I love to make them laugh.  Everyone has maybe said something or done something that they know better of now.  I've worked hard to maintain the strong friendships that I have.  I do not take for granted being a husband or father.  You will never find a brotherhood like I have.  This is why I am asking Coach Ryan "Cowboy" Ehmann to fill me up with what he knows about nutrition, State of Mind, and fitness success.