Hi all.
Where I come from, a handshake is important. It tells the other person who you are and how you are. We are tought a good firm handshake is important in letting yourself be known. Also, a handshake can be the "fine print" in a verbal contract or committment. A handshake is significant, because it involves your hands. Your hands is how a lot of people make a living, where I'm from. Whether it's construction, logging, building fences, chores, ranching or turning wrenches as a mechanic, your hands earn your bread and butter. Yeah, but they also form an agreement.
If you go back on your word, then your name can be run in the mud. If you break your handshake's significance for any reason, your character will show. It's not about the actual broken promise or not keeping your word, as much as it is as, yeah, we had an agreement and it's not been followed perfectly. But what are you going to do from here. Just quit? No. You get back up and you get the job done. You don't sit and dwell.
I remember when one of my brothers was helping our uncle one summer. It wasn't a "job" as much as it was for keeping my brother busy, but also a way to help our uncle with some extra money by selling firewood. My uncle would come home and the 2 of them would drive off in a fully loaded truck of firewood, either split or not split. My uncle would receive calls from random people who had requests. Then, my brother had a number of loads he was to prepare. This lasted the whole summer. I can think of only 2 days of the entire summer where my brother did not have a load prepared already, by the time our uncle got done. But he didn't sit there and wait for my uncle to get home and then wait for my uncle to do the load himself. Instead, whether he'd woke late or whatever, the distraction was, he went out and did what he said he was going to do, although it was not perfect. The end result was still acheived through hard work.
Losing inches and gaining knowledge is getting to be a lot tougher than I ever expected. This does not discourage me as much as it makes me realize something. This time around, I'm more serious. The fact that it bothers me when I don't work out, or when I make a bad choice with food... It makes more sense now. Before, it would not bother me. Now, I'm getting to the point where I can see all of these things that have enabled me to get to the point or weight and being so ridiculously unfit.
I've decided that I want to go back and see if there are any things or pieces that I've missed in the reading for the conditioning the mind. I want to get prepared b/c I really want to give it a go. I feel like I've just been playing around with this stuff for going on 3 months now. I want to see it work, more. We saw 22+ inches leave. Now I want more. I want more knowledge.
I want to fly over to Loveland Colorado and go into the Lose 12 Inches gym and smack Coach right in the mouth to where his jaw drops and he sees what I've done. Then I want him to bust my ass, to which I'll get up from the floor, hurting, sore, sweating and say, "have you had enough, Coach?" Bring it on.
Just an update: our kitchen is being torn out and remodeled. Found out there was a busted/cracked drainage pipe between our floor and the ceiling of the downstairs basement, in the duplex we rent. FUN! So the cabinets/cupboards, fridge, all have been cleaned out. We get to use the kitchen downstairs and live upstairs. Thinking about calling our renter's insurance place to see what the details are on how an extended stay place might work out in this situation. But I tell you, it only ads to the challenge! We'll wake up Christmas morning and look back and say, "Look where we were and what we went through. Look where we are."
Where is my handshake to myself? Make it right.
A special shout out to Summer! She was extremely helpful over a chat session online the other day. Helped me find the good in where I am at. This whole time, I've been wanting to bury my head because it has not been perfect. Just so everyone knows, behind every great man, there is a great woman (typically).
Coach has Summer. Chris Powell has Heidi. (I wonder if their reading this????) My buddy is marrying a great gal this summer. A couple of my other buddies have stressful jobs as well, and they are also married to wonderful women who are supportive.
Thank you for being my great woman Katie! Thank you for your handshake. I know you love me more than Disney! ;)
Friday, May 31, 2013
Thursday, May 16, 2013
The History of Clothes Shopping
It turns out that my buddy is serious about marrying his fiance. :) This means, honored as I am to be part of their big day, that your's truly is going to get all gussied up. Couldn't ask for a couple of nicer people to get hitched to one another. Getting a tux that fits is a problem. It always has been. Well, I take that back. My wife and I's wedding, my tux fit nicely. I was quite dapper. Nervous as all get out, but still, it was nice to not have to worry about it.
One wedding in particular, for my cousin... We took all of the appropriate measures of measuring early, like the tux store said to. Gave them time, like the tux store said to. Get measured a 2nd time for good measure, like the tux store said to. Mind you, this is back in the day (a Wednesday, if you're taking notes), back in the day when I was in decent shape. I played a lot of hoops back then. I was hiking, walking, etc... just active. A lot of activity. Not eating 3 meals, skipping meals at that, but still, smaller than I am now, by a long shot.
Getting fitted for a tux is fun, but not when you feel like the attention is now on you, instead of the people it should be on. We eneded up stitching one side of the vest to the side of the shirt so that they were worn as one. To allow room in the middle. The pants fit though, it was the shirt that was not handled well with the fitting and measuring. At my cousin's wedding, I wore my vest and my tux coat all night! Had no choice. I rocked it, no doubt. I cut some serious rug, ALL NIGHT! It was a big celebration! But I did feel bad my my cousin and his wife. How stressful and unsatisfying, for pictures and such.
Getting fitted for a tux for this wedding is becoming an issue. I bet the bride-to-be is pulling her hair out. It is their wedding! Most people only plan to have one for their entire life! It's a big deal! When I went into the store, it was comical, when I got measured. The guy had to have me hold the tape on one side, then he walked around me to bring the other end to meet up. Like he was walking this big ol' horse by rope and bridle. It was embarassing, but funny. Even when we bought the tape to take my measurements at home, we got the extra long one. My wife has a huckuva time doing my measurements. Here I am at 6'3" and her at 5'2". You don't see many 5'2" people with extra long arms. She needs a step stool and everything to get my shoulders and my neck. She does really good on my calf though.
As far as prom my senior year in HS, as well, the other weddings I've been in, it's always been an issue. Things happen whether we want them to or not. Some things, require our planning. Then, some things, do not go as we planned. The task before me is that I must be at 60' around my belly at its biggest point. This is for the pants to fit correctly. You see, my pants normally, I wear on my hips and use a belt because.... um, well... I have no ass. I mean, I do, but I don't. It's wide because I'm wide. But there is no curve to it.
I'd like to change that, but for now, I know I'm not going to get me some Beyonce/J-Lo boo-tay shape. Being a guy, I'm not sure who's male butt I want mine to resemble, but I do know that I could use a little more umph in my buttucks. Junk in the trunk. My pants do not stay up. It's not funny, really. I know it is fun to make jokes about it. But still. To the day, if I am at work, it's normally slacks with a belt. At home, it's basketball shorts or cargo shorts. But just buying bigger sizes to accommadate my body is not fixing the problem. Eathing unhealthy, skipping meals, a non-active life. Those are the problems.
Got off track, again. Sorry. So back to the fitting of the pants. I told my buddy he had my word that I'd try. Very hard, I'll try. I will. I've already gotten back on the horse and have been doing my workouts. Every other day, in fact, instead of setting the goal of 3x per week. It's still a good goal. It's better than doing nothing. It is not detouring me from my overall lifestyle change goals though. It is just part of them now. But I do realize it is a big task. Challeng accepted. Compared to where I was a year ago, at 535 lbs, to now being 446 lbs... I'd like to continue this journey. I feel it's important to set little goals, to acheive your big goal.
At some point, we need to not focus on everything that goes wrong every day. That will overwhelm us. I like it better to acknowledge what is happening around us, but to use that as fuel for the current fight. Then turn around one day and say, "We went through all of that and look where we are." Yeah, life can get tough. It can get down right cruddy. But, it will go on without you, if you let it. Or you can be part of it.
Coach put on his Facebook the other day, a quote from Tony Robbins, which I do not know exactly how it goes. Quotes are great, but can lose their power if not said/read correctly. So hear it goes: "If you focus on all the troubles instead of the end result, you'll fail."
I understand that I totally just said I couldn't quote him, but then put it in quotes... That was more for your viewing pleasure. I hope you an appreciate that I'm trying to enhance your reading pleasure. :) Did anyone else catch that I put hear instead of here? Again... an enhancement for you. Instead of what you read, listen to what Tony Robbins is trying to tell you. Sidney and Billy from "White Men Can't Jump" argued about that very thing. Are you hearing the music? Or just listening? Yes, as a matter of fact, I do know I'm a dork. My friend that has his own blog also quoted the last LDS Conference, where one of the Presidents said, "Don't die with your music still in you!" That is very cool. More importantly, it is true. My wife and kids, my siblings, my parents passing, sicknesses, strifes, successes. All of that is part of my song. :) Cheesy or not, take what you want out of it. But I do appreciate you reading my blog, whoever you are.
Enjoy your day! Working out tonight! I am going to try something different. My buddy, Chris, who is following along with me on a lifestyle change, has inspired me to try again, to incorporate lifting weights, while in the Cowboy Fit Zone! So, we'll see how it goes.
One wedding in particular, for my cousin... We took all of the appropriate measures of measuring early, like the tux store said to. Gave them time, like the tux store said to. Get measured a 2nd time for good measure, like the tux store said to. Mind you, this is back in the day (a Wednesday, if you're taking notes), back in the day when I was in decent shape. I played a lot of hoops back then. I was hiking, walking, etc... just active. A lot of activity. Not eating 3 meals, skipping meals at that, but still, smaller than I am now, by a long shot.
Getting fitted for a tux is fun, but not when you feel like the attention is now on you, instead of the people it should be on. We eneded up stitching one side of the vest to the side of the shirt so that they were worn as one. To allow room in the middle. The pants fit though, it was the shirt that was not handled well with the fitting and measuring. At my cousin's wedding, I wore my vest and my tux coat all night! Had no choice. I rocked it, no doubt. I cut some serious rug, ALL NIGHT! It was a big celebration! But I did feel bad my my cousin and his wife. How stressful and unsatisfying, for pictures and such.
Getting fitted for a tux for this wedding is becoming an issue. I bet the bride-to-be is pulling her hair out. It is their wedding! Most people only plan to have one for their entire life! It's a big deal! When I went into the store, it was comical, when I got measured. The guy had to have me hold the tape on one side, then he walked around me to bring the other end to meet up. Like he was walking this big ol' horse by rope and bridle. It was embarassing, but funny. Even when we bought the tape to take my measurements at home, we got the extra long one. My wife has a huckuva time doing my measurements. Here I am at 6'3" and her at 5'2". You don't see many 5'2" people with extra long arms. She needs a step stool and everything to get my shoulders and my neck. She does really good on my calf though.
As far as prom my senior year in HS, as well, the other weddings I've been in, it's always been an issue. Things happen whether we want them to or not. Some things, require our planning. Then, some things, do not go as we planned. The task before me is that I must be at 60' around my belly at its biggest point. This is for the pants to fit correctly. You see, my pants normally, I wear on my hips and use a belt because.... um, well... I have no ass. I mean, I do, but I don't. It's wide because I'm wide. But there is no curve to it.
I'd like to change that, but for now, I know I'm not going to get me some Beyonce/J-Lo boo-tay shape. Being a guy, I'm not sure who's male butt I want mine to resemble, but I do know that I could use a little more umph in my buttucks. Junk in the trunk. My pants do not stay up. It's not funny, really. I know it is fun to make jokes about it. But still. To the day, if I am at work, it's normally slacks with a belt. At home, it's basketball shorts or cargo shorts. But just buying bigger sizes to accommadate my body is not fixing the problem. Eathing unhealthy, skipping meals, a non-active life. Those are the problems.
Got off track, again. Sorry. So back to the fitting of the pants. I told my buddy he had my word that I'd try. Very hard, I'll try. I will. I've already gotten back on the horse and have been doing my workouts. Every other day, in fact, instead of setting the goal of 3x per week. It's still a good goal. It's better than doing nothing. It is not detouring me from my overall lifestyle change goals though. It is just part of them now. But I do realize it is a big task. Challeng accepted. Compared to where I was a year ago, at 535 lbs, to now being 446 lbs... I'd like to continue this journey. I feel it's important to set little goals, to acheive your big goal.
At some point, we need to not focus on everything that goes wrong every day. That will overwhelm us. I like it better to acknowledge what is happening around us, but to use that as fuel for the current fight. Then turn around one day and say, "We went through all of that and look where we are." Yeah, life can get tough. It can get down right cruddy. But, it will go on without you, if you let it. Or you can be part of it.
Coach put on his Facebook the other day, a quote from Tony Robbins, which I do not know exactly how it goes. Quotes are great, but can lose their power if not said/read correctly. So hear it goes: "If you focus on all the troubles instead of the end result, you'll fail."
I understand that I totally just said I couldn't quote him, but then put it in quotes... That was more for your viewing pleasure. I hope you an appreciate that I'm trying to enhance your reading pleasure. :) Did anyone else catch that I put hear instead of here? Again... an enhancement for you. Instead of what you read, listen to what Tony Robbins is trying to tell you. Sidney and Billy from "White Men Can't Jump" argued about that very thing. Are you hearing the music? Or just listening? Yes, as a matter of fact, I do know I'm a dork. My friend that has his own blog also quoted the last LDS Conference, where one of the Presidents said, "Don't die with your music still in you!" That is very cool. More importantly, it is true. My wife and kids, my siblings, my parents passing, sicknesses, strifes, successes. All of that is part of my song. :) Cheesy or not, take what you want out of it. But I do appreciate you reading my blog, whoever you are.
Enjoy your day! Working out tonight! I am going to try something different. My buddy, Chris, who is following along with me on a lifestyle change, has inspired me to try again, to incorporate lifting weights, while in the Cowboy Fit Zone! So, we'll see how it goes.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Happy Mother's Day!!!
As I sit here and listen to George Strait on the computer, I think, this is a good time to blog!!!
Seriously, my wife it the best! Today we did not go out and binge eat until we felt sick, nor did we go out and impulsively spend money we did not have. Instead, I let Katie sleep in. Tate and I were awake at 6:30 a.m. We had some good one on one time, just him and daddy. Got his medicines done (he has asthma and we use some inhalers and such). Fed him some breakfast, we wrestled, then I put his signature on the Mother's Day card I picked out for Katie. Cece was still asleep for a little bit. I took that opportunity to make Katie a "coupon" book for stuff around the house, chores, girls day out, a day off from being Mom, back rub, etc... She woke up shortly after. We both had a good laugh when she read the coupon book out loud.
You see, I think I'm funny. So when I have her read stuff to me, it's like I'm hearing the jokes for the first time and I still laugh as if somebody else made it up!!!! It is a 2 for one switch because either she thinks it's a funny joke, or she can just get a laugh at me for laughing at my own writing. :) But after that, we had a low key day of hanging out, eating small meals. Ended up at her mom's house. We were visited there by a couple of her siblings and their families, for them to wish Happy Mother's Day to my mother-in-law. Good company. We have not seen them for a good amount of time, considering we all live in the Salt Lake City area. It was fun.
Anyhow, Katie was feeling some pretty strong emotions on this last Friday. I have shared some stories about my parents with her, naturally. One of them was that my mom told me, close to a Mother's Day, one year during my childhood, that her favorite color was yellow. So, I am not sure why, but of all the things we remember about each other as siblings, friends, best friends, or whoever, we remember certain things. This one something that I've always come back to as a memory. My dad took us kids shopping (our family was not complete at this time), but we didn't know what to get her. I dislike shopping for other people sometimes, now that I'm an adult, But I figure that my dad wanted us kids to get a couple of somethings for her. So, since I remembered that she liked yellow, my gift to her was a sweater that happened to be yellow.
Whether it was genuine excitement or my mom doing a damn good acting job... she had the biggest eyes and a big ol' smile when she opened the gift. She held it up proudly and said, "I know who this is from!" It has always stuck with me because I can remember clearly that she wore that sweater. More than a few times a year. Even on some days, I'd ask her childlike, "Do you remember when you got that sweater?" She would reply with "Of course! I love yellow!!!" It must have made her feel good to know that she could make me smile so big when she said that.
Well, this is something that Katie takes dearly and she lets me, as well even likes the stories I share about my parents. So, I'll quote her post on Facebook on Friday:
"I love putting Cece in yellow... she looks so beautiful in it. Then every time I look at her in yellow, I think of my loving mother in law I've never met. I hope she knows I think about her. How I wish I could have met her. How can you miss someone you never knew...?"
So, today and tonight, I processed through some feelings and thoughts. I'm a believer that those who have passed, visit me. I don't know if everyone in my family feels this way, but when my dad, my mom, or my grandma are present in my dreams, it really does feel like a visit. I ask them how they are. Sometimes, I even tell them that, "we can just make this quick... I know this is just a dream." :) But still, there are times I wish I would get "visited" and they don't come. Other times, they come when I don't expect it in the least. Well, I can tell you, that based on the dreams I've had, both of my parents have visited me (individually) to tell me how they are so happy that I'm happy. They have never told me about how they feel about Tate and Cece, but instead, they focus more on Katie. I remember being told in one of my dreams, from my mom, "Katie is adorable and I can tell you are yourself around her. I love her so much." That has stuck with me for the last couple of years! I'm not ruling out that it could be just a dream. Maybe you feel the same way, thinking that nobody can control what they dream or think. Oh well.
My feelings for Katie and the fact that we have a family. I don't know that I can put it into words. I know that we moved very fast when we got together. We were married inside 6 months of meeting. My mom and dad were married withing 7 months of dating. They lasted for 19 years, all the way up to the death date of my mother. It was hard on my dad. I saw it. I bet it was even harder than what I saw. There are times where I wish I was a little older back then, to understand how hard it was for him. To sit down and ask him, "Hey dad, how are you doing?" I know that when I feel down and no one asks me how I'm doing, that it's almost a lonelier feeling! Like nobody cares! Geez, to know then what I know now. But my feelings tonight, for my children's mother and my best friend: I'd pick her all over again.
A few weeks ago, when I felt like I was giving up... I didn't like it. I know it's going to be tough. I know that I'll have challenges: birthdays, anniversaries, plateaus, celebrations, graduations, road trips, weddings, work parties, etc... I know that if I set a goal of working out every other day, that one day, maybe, there might come a time where I don't get a work out in. But that can't bring on a string of 30 days, 15 days, heck even 6 days of not doing something active! Results require action.
Overall, I know I want to do better, but still want to keep myself grounded and take any success I can to build my fitness self esteem... but, I'm pretty proud of myself. I know my parents are. I know my siblings are. I know my buddies are. I know my wife is. I hope some day, my kids can look back at my pictures now, compare them to where I want to be in 30 years, and tell me they are proud of me too! I'm making progress on the heart rate training. Yesterday's workout was a full 12 minute warm up on the exercise bike followed with a solid 30 minutes of constant Cowboy Fit Zone heart rate on the elliptical machine! That is crazy to me because when I started a being more active just weeks ago, I could not even do 5 minutes!!!! Tomorrow is a workout day and I'm excited! I have not been excited to work out in a couple of weeks.
Happy Mother's Day to my beautiful mom. You are missed dearly. Happy Mother's Day to my gramma. I love you. Most of all, thank you and Happy Mother's Day to my best friend, my bride, Katie. My wish is that we will be blessed with many more Mother's Days together.
Seriously, my wife it the best! Today we did not go out and binge eat until we felt sick, nor did we go out and impulsively spend money we did not have. Instead, I let Katie sleep in. Tate and I were awake at 6:30 a.m. We had some good one on one time, just him and daddy. Got his medicines done (he has asthma and we use some inhalers and such). Fed him some breakfast, we wrestled, then I put his signature on the Mother's Day card I picked out for Katie. Cece was still asleep for a little bit. I took that opportunity to make Katie a "coupon" book for stuff around the house, chores, girls day out, a day off from being Mom, back rub, etc... She woke up shortly after. We both had a good laugh when she read the coupon book out loud.
You see, I think I'm funny. So when I have her read stuff to me, it's like I'm hearing the jokes for the first time and I still laugh as if somebody else made it up!!!! It is a 2 for one switch because either she thinks it's a funny joke, or she can just get a laugh at me for laughing at my own writing. :) But after that, we had a low key day of hanging out, eating small meals. Ended up at her mom's house. We were visited there by a couple of her siblings and their families, for them to wish Happy Mother's Day to my mother-in-law. Good company. We have not seen them for a good amount of time, considering we all live in the Salt Lake City area. It was fun.
Anyhow, Katie was feeling some pretty strong emotions on this last Friday. I have shared some stories about my parents with her, naturally. One of them was that my mom told me, close to a Mother's Day, one year during my childhood, that her favorite color was yellow. So, I am not sure why, but of all the things we remember about each other as siblings, friends, best friends, or whoever, we remember certain things. This one something that I've always come back to as a memory. My dad took us kids shopping (our family was not complete at this time), but we didn't know what to get her. I dislike shopping for other people sometimes, now that I'm an adult, But I figure that my dad wanted us kids to get a couple of somethings for her. So, since I remembered that she liked yellow, my gift to her was a sweater that happened to be yellow.
Whether it was genuine excitement or my mom doing a damn good acting job... she had the biggest eyes and a big ol' smile when she opened the gift. She held it up proudly and said, "I know who this is from!" It has always stuck with me because I can remember clearly that she wore that sweater. More than a few times a year. Even on some days, I'd ask her childlike, "Do you remember when you got that sweater?" She would reply with "Of course! I love yellow!!!" It must have made her feel good to know that she could make me smile so big when she said that.
Well, this is something that Katie takes dearly and she lets me, as well even likes the stories I share about my parents. So, I'll quote her post on Facebook on Friday:
"I love putting Cece in yellow... she looks so beautiful in it. Then every time I look at her in yellow, I think of my loving mother in law I've never met. I hope she knows I think about her. How I wish I could have met her. How can you miss someone you never knew...?"
So, today and tonight, I processed through some feelings and thoughts. I'm a believer that those who have passed, visit me. I don't know if everyone in my family feels this way, but when my dad, my mom, or my grandma are present in my dreams, it really does feel like a visit. I ask them how they are. Sometimes, I even tell them that, "we can just make this quick... I know this is just a dream." :) But still, there are times I wish I would get "visited" and they don't come. Other times, they come when I don't expect it in the least. Well, I can tell you, that based on the dreams I've had, both of my parents have visited me (individually) to tell me how they are so happy that I'm happy. They have never told me about how they feel about Tate and Cece, but instead, they focus more on Katie. I remember being told in one of my dreams, from my mom, "Katie is adorable and I can tell you are yourself around her. I love her so much." That has stuck with me for the last couple of years! I'm not ruling out that it could be just a dream. Maybe you feel the same way, thinking that nobody can control what they dream or think. Oh well.
My feelings for Katie and the fact that we have a family. I don't know that I can put it into words. I know that we moved very fast when we got together. We were married inside 6 months of meeting. My mom and dad were married withing 7 months of dating. They lasted for 19 years, all the way up to the death date of my mother. It was hard on my dad. I saw it. I bet it was even harder than what I saw. There are times where I wish I was a little older back then, to understand how hard it was for him. To sit down and ask him, "Hey dad, how are you doing?" I know that when I feel down and no one asks me how I'm doing, that it's almost a lonelier feeling! Like nobody cares! Geez, to know then what I know now. But my feelings tonight, for my children's mother and my best friend: I'd pick her all over again.
A few weeks ago, when I felt like I was giving up... I didn't like it. I know it's going to be tough. I know that I'll have challenges: birthdays, anniversaries, plateaus, celebrations, graduations, road trips, weddings, work parties, etc... I know that if I set a goal of working out every other day, that one day, maybe, there might come a time where I don't get a work out in. But that can't bring on a string of 30 days, 15 days, heck even 6 days of not doing something active! Results require action.
Overall, I know I want to do better, but still want to keep myself grounded and take any success I can to build my fitness self esteem... but, I'm pretty proud of myself. I know my parents are. I know my siblings are. I know my buddies are. I know my wife is. I hope some day, my kids can look back at my pictures now, compare them to where I want to be in 30 years, and tell me they are proud of me too! I'm making progress on the heart rate training. Yesterday's workout was a full 12 minute warm up on the exercise bike followed with a solid 30 minutes of constant Cowboy Fit Zone heart rate on the elliptical machine! That is crazy to me because when I started a being more active just weeks ago, I could not even do 5 minutes!!!! Tomorrow is a workout day and I'm excited! I have not been excited to work out in a couple of weeks.
Happy Mother's Day to my beautiful mom. You are missed dearly. Happy Mother's Day to my gramma. I love you. Most of all, thank you and Happy Mother's Day to my best friend, my bride, Katie. My wish is that we will be blessed with many more Mother's Days together.
Friday, May 10, 2013
Blogger's Block
Hello friends and followers.
I'm searching for different ideas for my blog. It's kind of plain. Matter of fact, in this last week or so, that is main reason I have not blogged.
I'd like to share some feelings for a couple of minutes. I am battling with the idea that blogging is taking time away from my family. Whether it be my kids individually, or together, my siblings, my neices and my nephew, my cousins. Mainly, I have felt in the past that it's taken time away from my wife. Having kids and a wife is something that I pictured for a while, of ever having them in my life. Remaining single. That is something that I came to the realization, I may not ever get them. I had to be ok with the thought of never having them. I had to find things about myself that I liked. Now I have them and I love it. The funny thing is, no one tells you how tough it can be. :) But I wouldn't trade it for anything. Plus, still being fairly new to the parenting, our boy Tate is 2 1/2 years old. Heck, not just parenting, just being married! This December will be 4 years! That is crazy to me. But it's something that I cherish. I don't want my selfishness and bad choices to take away from what my family deserves.
I've been told in the past, that it's ok to do things for Nick once in a while. I know this. When it's someone else that is needing advice, I have been known to lend an ear, or some unwanted truth. It's real. So, as far as taking time to get a degree in communications or in finance, or blogging as a hobby/therapy, haha, well, it's tough for me. If I feel like it's consuming me, my natural for me to "protect" my family from me not being right there, the moment they need me, or in any case, just want me. As I am still adapting to better choices for my health, I know and understand these are choices, consistent or not, that benefit my health, which is what I want. It's one thing if I'm tragically taken from my wife, kids, siblings, cousins, aunts & uncles, friends, etc... I'm very ok with death. We learned it at a very young age. But I am disgusted wtih the fact that by my being overweight, unfit and making bad unhealthy food choices, I am enabling a possible cause of death. Who is to say that I won't outlive my kids, or my wife. Things happen even if we don't choose them. We/I have to capitalize on the time that we do have here. Not worry about death. It happens to everyone. Everyone experiences a loss. Regardless of who it is, a loss is a loss. Friend, relative, immediate family or even a co-worker. There are tragedies, accidents and illness. Sadly, there are suicides. Death happens. But you know what? SO DOES LIFE!!! What am/are I/we going to do with it?
Sorry, I got off track some, but I was saying, blogging, has opened my mind back up to old thoughts, back in the day (a Wednesday), for my writing and thoughts of being an inspirational speaker. Funny becuase I've put all that stuff behind me for quite some time. Just until recently, opening up into the blog world, it has rekindled the smolder. Not quite a real big kind of fire. Just a small one. Let's put it this way... I've entertained the idea of being a writer of sorts and/or an inspirational speaker.
As for the blog, I have shared before, I get to thinking. How much of my life and my family do I want to put on here? I'd like to have some privacy. The blog is public and as far as I'm concerned, that was the idea. It still is. I don't plan on changing that. But as well, I think, my immediate family is just as much a part of this as I am. It takes commitment from them with supporting me, being honest with me, holding me accountable. Heck, some of them have stepped in and bought us food, gym memberships, kitchen table and even being willing to accept that I mention them in my blog, that is open to the public.
During this time though, I've definitely gone through some emotions. I've noticed changes in my clothes and my ring finger when my wedding ring slides around when I dribble a basketball. I know that with this journey to a healthier lifestyle and fitness success trek, you don't just sort through body changes, hormones or feelings. I expect it. Some days it's hard. Very hard. I've never been a binge/purge type of eater. Not even when I was drinking back in the day (...Wednesday, remember?), I never binged/purged.
It will not happen over night. Inspiration comes from everywhere, if you're willing to look for it. For me, inspiration comes from my wife and kids. I enjoy them being with me. I enjoy making them smile and laugh. I enjoy a good "chick flick" from time to time. I enjoy a lot of things. Soon, the series of ABC's Extreme Makeover: Weightloss Edition is going to start again this season, end of the month I think. I'd love to meet that Chris Powell guy. He is inspiring. A lot like Coach Ryan (whom I have not heard from in a while). I wonder what's new with him.
Funny thing, I like the other show ABC did; Extreme Makeover (where they rebuilt houses)... I always thought it would be cool to help them folks out.
But, just to share with you guys the random thoughts that I've had that have distracted me from blogging. I also don't want to be blogging to get attention. I don't know why, but I love making people laugh and smile and say to themself, "What the heck did that guy just say?!!?" So, it's weird to hear myself say that I don't like attention. But in this case, I just don't know if I know how to deal with attention that is not from me making jokes. Instead, it's attention from my blog. From me trying to gain knowledge and impliment changes for fitness success. Attention that is based off of my health. I've been unhealthy for a long time and it's always just been something I've lived with.
I'm not profreading this one. Just going to post it, before I start rambling again.
Happy Mother's Day to my wife Katie. I'd pick you all over again! You're my princess. I love you dearly. Thank you for my family.
I'm searching for different ideas for my blog. It's kind of plain. Matter of fact, in this last week or so, that is main reason I have not blogged.
I'd like to share some feelings for a couple of minutes. I am battling with the idea that blogging is taking time away from my family. Whether it be my kids individually, or together, my siblings, my neices and my nephew, my cousins. Mainly, I have felt in the past that it's taken time away from my wife. Having kids and a wife is something that I pictured for a while, of ever having them in my life. Remaining single. That is something that I came to the realization, I may not ever get them. I had to be ok with the thought of never having them. I had to find things about myself that I liked. Now I have them and I love it. The funny thing is, no one tells you how tough it can be. :) But I wouldn't trade it for anything. Plus, still being fairly new to the parenting, our boy Tate is 2 1/2 years old. Heck, not just parenting, just being married! This December will be 4 years! That is crazy to me. But it's something that I cherish. I don't want my selfishness and bad choices to take away from what my family deserves.
I've been told in the past, that it's ok to do things for Nick once in a while. I know this. When it's someone else that is needing advice, I have been known to lend an ear, or some unwanted truth. It's real. So, as far as taking time to get a degree in communications or in finance, or blogging as a hobby/therapy, haha, well, it's tough for me. If I feel like it's consuming me, my natural for me to "protect" my family from me not being right there, the moment they need me, or in any case, just want me. As I am still adapting to better choices for my health, I know and understand these are choices, consistent or not, that benefit my health, which is what I want. It's one thing if I'm tragically taken from my wife, kids, siblings, cousins, aunts & uncles, friends, etc... I'm very ok with death. We learned it at a very young age. But I am disgusted wtih the fact that by my being overweight, unfit and making bad unhealthy food choices, I am enabling a possible cause of death. Who is to say that I won't outlive my kids, or my wife. Things happen even if we don't choose them. We/I have to capitalize on the time that we do have here. Not worry about death. It happens to everyone. Everyone experiences a loss. Regardless of who it is, a loss is a loss. Friend, relative, immediate family or even a co-worker. There are tragedies, accidents and illness. Sadly, there are suicides. Death happens. But you know what? SO DOES LIFE!!! What am/are I/we going to do with it?
Sorry, I got off track some, but I was saying, blogging, has opened my mind back up to old thoughts, back in the day (a Wednesday), for my writing and thoughts of being an inspirational speaker. Funny becuase I've put all that stuff behind me for quite some time. Just until recently, opening up into the blog world, it has rekindled the smolder. Not quite a real big kind of fire. Just a small one. Let's put it this way... I've entertained the idea of being a writer of sorts and/or an inspirational speaker.
As for the blog, I have shared before, I get to thinking. How much of my life and my family do I want to put on here? I'd like to have some privacy. The blog is public and as far as I'm concerned, that was the idea. It still is. I don't plan on changing that. But as well, I think, my immediate family is just as much a part of this as I am. It takes commitment from them with supporting me, being honest with me, holding me accountable. Heck, some of them have stepped in and bought us food, gym memberships, kitchen table and even being willing to accept that I mention them in my blog, that is open to the public.
During this time though, I've definitely gone through some emotions. I've noticed changes in my clothes and my ring finger when my wedding ring slides around when I dribble a basketball. I know that with this journey to a healthier lifestyle and fitness success trek, you don't just sort through body changes, hormones or feelings. I expect it. Some days it's hard. Very hard. I've never been a binge/purge type of eater. Not even when I was drinking back in the day (...Wednesday, remember?), I never binged/purged.
It will not happen over night. Inspiration comes from everywhere, if you're willing to look for it. For me, inspiration comes from my wife and kids. I enjoy them being with me. I enjoy making them smile and laugh. I enjoy a good "chick flick" from time to time. I enjoy a lot of things. Soon, the series of ABC's Extreme Makeover: Weightloss Edition is going to start again this season, end of the month I think. I'd love to meet that Chris Powell guy. He is inspiring. A lot like Coach Ryan (whom I have not heard from in a while). I wonder what's new with him.
Funny thing, I like the other show ABC did; Extreme Makeover (where they rebuilt houses)... I always thought it would be cool to help them folks out.
But, just to share with you guys the random thoughts that I've had that have distracted me from blogging. I also don't want to be blogging to get attention. I don't know why, but I love making people laugh and smile and say to themself, "What the heck did that guy just say?!!?" So, it's weird to hear myself say that I don't like attention. But in this case, I just don't know if I know how to deal with attention that is not from me making jokes. Instead, it's attention from my blog. From me trying to gain knowledge and impliment changes for fitness success. Attention that is based off of my health. I've been unhealthy for a long time and it's always just been something I've lived with.
I'm not profreading this one. Just going to post it, before I start rambling again.
Happy Mother's Day to my wife Katie. I'd pick you all over again! You're my princess. I love you dearly. Thank you for my family.
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Today's Challenge
Instead of me psyching myself out with thinking how big 40 days is, I'll focus on the day's challenge. The day's meals. The day's workouts. The day's strength conditioning. Maybe even, the first half of the day. Then another challenge for the second half of the day.
Today's challenge: don't procrastinate doing your morning strength conditioning.
40 push-ups
40 squats
+40 sit-ups
__________
DONE
Now to fous on meals, meal times, water, attitude, prep for tonight's strength conditioning and prep for tomorrow's challenge.
I figure, a streak starts with one. Good or bad, right? Well, this morning, so far, I've started a good streak by following last night's workout (although I struggled to stay in my heart rate zone), with good choices this morning and following through with the strength conditioning.
Have I told ya'll lately how much I love my wife and kiddos? :D
So c'mon everybody, set your daily challenge and go get it! If you want change, take action. If you think you've decided to change, you haven't truly decided unless you take action.
Thank you everyone for your support. Talk to ya'll soon.
Today's challenge: don't procrastinate doing your morning strength conditioning.
40 push-ups
40 squats
+40 sit-ups
__________
DONE
Now to fous on meals, meal times, water, attitude, prep for tonight's strength conditioning and prep for tomorrow's challenge.
I figure, a streak starts with one. Good or bad, right? Well, this morning, so far, I've started a good streak by following last night's workout (although I struggled to stay in my heart rate zone), with good choices this morning and following through with the strength conditioning.
Have I told ya'll lately how much I love my wife and kiddos? :D
So c'mon everybody, set your daily challenge and go get it! If you want change, take action. If you think you've decided to change, you haven't truly decided unless you take action.
Thank you everyone for your support. Talk to ya'll soon.
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